2015-03-27: Vibrant Flavours

Marlboro have something here called IQOS. It appeared to be some new electronic cigarette. Somehow I managed to inform the guy behind the counter that I wanted to have a look at it. Seems interesting. It uses actual tobacco (unlike electronic cigarettes) but the tobacco comes in little capsules like ecigs.

Coffee Boss has always had a pipe as long as I have known him

The tobacco is heated (not burned) to much lower temperatures than a cigarette and the nicotine apparently is produced without the nasty things. They throw some glycol in there to get "smoke". Apparently it is undergoing testing to see if it does actually fall into the "less harmful" category and is the Phillip Morris big play into the brave new world of cigarette replacement ideas.
You can only buy them in Nagoya and some place in Italy.

I guess they are testing Tommy Lee Jones and his robot as the new Coffee Boss. Maybe he will get an electronic pipe.

This is because Nagoya has traditionally been a test market for Japan as it sits sort of in the middle of the dominant consumer styles. My interpretation of the conversation is that the people living here are open to new ideas more-so than say Kyoto people but aren't slaves to fashion like Tokyo inhabitants (although that could be me ascribing meaning to statements which didn't necessarily have them).
As a result Nagoya has the people and infrastructure for multinationals market testing as well. That is cool.

This is a plastic version of the thing I bought Ewa thinking it was a salad. I should have noticed it had microwave instructions on it. It is still in the fridge. Ewa is not a good test market person!

There is a Denny's down the road, might go see if they have any market testing products. Although I don't know what they have normally so I guess that doesn't work. We were going to go to the Denny's at some point because Jon Stewart always makes fun of them for no reason. Watching The Daily Show last night I realised it is actually Arby's he makes fun of for no reason. I don't know if there is an Arby's in Nagoya. Maybe we go to Denny's and complain how Arby's sucks?

I don't have a clue how to use the fancy bits

I have my new keyboard amongst all my new computer purchases. I cant touch type but I do type at reasonable speeds. This keyboard is a japanese keyboard, I didn't even think of that when buying it. I only really cared if there was a gap between F4 and F5 as I use F5 all the time while watching output and when the gap is in the wrong place I get very annoyed.
About 20 or thirty keys do different things to what the printing on the key says. I have to just trust my instincts for which key to push. I am not the kind of person that should trust their instincts as a rule.

Food & Beverage Review: Yuko's Home Cooked Korean

We are bad people and have been eating way too much food from convenience stores and bars. I maintain that they are not bars, they are Izakaya and so might be healthy food, you never know.

Shiny Shiso Sake

Yuko has offered to cook us dinner and I am too sensible (and well barbered) to argue with two Ladies. Actually I was pretty interested to see what normal people eat as we are probably getting a pretty skewed vision of Japan.

I thought the little boxy house down the bottom looked way Polish, turns out it is a police station

The Japanese happily grab any decent food from the neighbouring countries and adapt it to their own tastes and ingredients. Ramen after all is a Chinese noodle. I think Japanese culture has a touch (well maybe more than a touch) of OCD about things and they take the ideas and, where an Antipodean chef might adjust Thai a little and call it a day, the Japanese work on it 'til it is wildly popular then industrialise the hell out of it.

At least one of us dressed up and accessorised for the occasion

As a result things like Japanese curry is easily available in Australian supermarkets. If this happens to the Japanese version of Korean soup cooked at the table I can only say the Australians will be happier.

You just can't walk into a room with this type of thing and not be happy

You start with a broth which comes in several flavours, I think it is powdered. At a pinch I think a beef stock would cover it as it seems fairly sweet. Then add kimchi, mushrooms, broccolini (the one with the yellow flowers), I think there were random other vegetables in there, cabbage which has minced beef sandwiched between the leaves, chicken meatballs and these brilliant little potato starch based noodles which are all knotted up into a little ball, kind of like when you buy shoe laces. Yuko says they have no flavour and no food value but they have better texture than styrofoam. I like them, they get coated in the soup and are fun to crunch away at.

Correct Time Per Section Of The Pot

 All of these are added at the table and everyone knows I love participation food. When it is ready you grab around in different areas of the pot for tasty things to eat. I needed to be reminded of the different parts of the pot bit of that concept as I found a rich vein of good stuff and mined it heartily.

That looks like a deep vein of broccolini right there cap'n, shall we dig?

Then after you have eaten all the stuff you do it again. I have a suspicion Yuko cooks like me and like every Polish Grandmother. We all make vast amounts of food and it is tasty and tempts our guests into suicide via ingestion of good stuff.
In theory you then move on to making rice balls in the broth but we had three issues with that phase.

1. Everyone was full of food
2. The booze was finished
3. Ewa might have got all Polish and thought the broth was to be drank like Polish soup

Rating: 9/10 (I can only hope more people try and like this and the broth gets exported on a massive scale)

Conrad and I ran off to the supermarket to grab supplies.

Fortunately the one thing I wanted was in English. It's like they knew I was soming!

Conrad is a fellow Naginata person and I think the martial arts training has warped his brain. He tolerates my behaviour with scarcely an eyelid batted. When I started acting coquettishly at the self checkout he just said I was "a good guy but an awful tourist".

I was just being a rebel is all. And I didn't have a handbag so what choice did I have?

We spent a bit of time in the booze aisle looking for things and I noticed that fucking Yellowtail is here as well. I do not particularly approve of this. I don't even really class myself as Australian anymore and still find it offensive that this could be the first impression someone gets of the country. If Japan declares war on Australia in about 30 years it will be because some 15 yr old Japanese kid got drunk on that stuff today and held a grudge. And I wouldn't blame him.

Free Curry with Beer. Kicks the crap out of any marketing scheme I have ever seen before.

Walking back I discovered I do not hear Japanese bicycles. Normally I am pretty good at hearing things but I thing this whole "where bikes can be and where they can't" being clearly signposted and clearly ignored has messed me up.

I can only really remember one thing at a time "do you want the same label or the same size? I will get one right"

We made it back without breaking anything and were welcomed by happy and pretty Ladies.

2015-03-26: Fish is Fine, Meat is Magnificent

I got a haircut. It was another exercise in pointing and making other people feel good. The Barber got to use both the English words he knew and was happy that I understood. He had charts of haircuts to choose from in a mix and match manner; side, back, top. There were no Dragon Ball Z pictures and I think he regarded my choices as stupid anyway so he did what he thought was best.

Hair Gel choices. Not sure if you choose the boy that looks most like you (purple?) or the boy you most want to be (orange - he looks like an innocent rascal) so I got the brown one.

He also had a bit of a giggle when he stepped away from using the straight razor to clean up the edges. I needed to cough quite badly but didn't know how to warn him and was not going to cough with that blade against my neck. Apparently use of the straight razor requires Federal licensing. Nail Artistes only need State licensing. I won't be trusting those Ladies near me with such low level qualification.

I had been in to his establishment a couple of days ago but I think he was busy at the time. Last time I couldn't figure out how to leave as the door had no handle or button or detector. Last time he laughed and showed me it has a pressure sensor.

You can tell he is a barber because the magic sink that folds out of the wall is a "lean forward" type. Beauticians use the "lean back" type. Presumably because of the lower qualification levels they would keep drowning customers.

He laughed when I made the same damn mistake this time.
I spread happiness behind me like rose petals cast aloft unto the vagaries of circumstance. I consider this a service to the world.

Sign Review: No Bikes

The sign says no bikes. I don't think there is much chance of me interpreting that wrong. Pretty damn universal iconography right there.

Maybe they just have the bike lanes so criminals breaking the law can do it in an orderly fashion

The Bike lanes exhibit another pretty universal message.

Rating: 10/10 (It throws into question every stereotype about Japanese society being all about obeying the rules)

Conrad found a gym for Ewa which has rehabilitation instructors and we wandered up (3Km walk, another milestone). We negotiated the details of what we wanted, how much it was, filled in the forms and everything. The Lady had quite weak English and the forms were in Japanese so we were quite proud of ourselves as a team.

That is just an awesome vehicle. In some ways I hope it isn't something official but in many ways I hope it is.

Then she hauled out the "if you have tattoos don't even bother" clause which is in English. Ewa has a unique Pretty Lady Tattoo. We left.
It might only be temporary but Japan just lost a few points in the "where shall we set up permanent residences" competition. To combat the sadness we stopped for a beer. The place was so good we went back for dinner. Also arguably because google translate said one of the dishes was Evil Beef Rib. Challenge accepted.

Food & Beverage Review: Meat Bye (Opposite CBC building)

I am not sure about the name, it might be Meat Bie. Stupid cool kids making logos with things in them instead of letters. I think it is also quite a new restaurant as I can't find it on google maps or a website or anything.

And Ewa jumped right on that bandwagon

It looks to be a heavily female friendly place. I didn't know what the baskets under the table were for until I saw the (predominantly female) clientèle putting bags and jackets into them.
Even the large group, which had some guys in it, the obvious social heavy hitter in the group was a Lady. This was especially noticeable because most of the places we have been cater very much for the Males.

You can still smoke at the table obviously, just because it is female focussed doesn't mean they are silly

The reason this appeared even odder to me was that it is a MEAT MEAT MEAT place. In most western countries a menu featuring a preponderance of meat is more likely to be aimed at males.

Smushed avacado and raw prawns, they don't even phase me now. Simple and Great

I would also risk saying it is a kind of fusion cooking where grilled meat has been done with Japanese sensibilities.

Not so evil now are you! Beef & Wasabi

Prosciutto blue cheese salad. Eating this we discovered that all westerners should throw away their knives and forks when presented with a salad. Chopsticks are the perfect utensil. They are so ridiculously good we can't believe it is not just standard practice for us.

Initially we were just going to have a small dinner but after the Evil Steak and Salad I got a bit excited and wanted to check the Pork and Chicken.

Pork Steak. Almost a ham steak, ludicrously dense but still moist and happy. Pickled carrot sweet and sour.

Chicken. Peppery and citrus salt.

The portions were not "Big Joes Gut Busting Meat Fiesta" style but rather very nice cuts fried really well and presented simply. I pride myself on my beef steaks and this one is easily in the same league as me, the chicken seemed better produce than I can get but a similar style to how I like to do it. The pork beats me hands down. It showed me clearly how quite small dishes can work well. Getting all 3 was an act of investigation and I could have easily gone home happy after the shared steak and salad. 

Rating: 9/10 (We will be back to check it wasn't a one off, I will probably have to eat more than I need again)

2015-03-25: Fine Students We Shall Be

We have applied for a Japanese teacher. Ewa covered almost 2 Km on her crutches walking up to the YWCA and back. So two goals in one day!

Tourist Checklist: Mecha Godzilla & Ninjas

Spraying down the Mecha Godzilla while he eats your city is not going to stop him

At first I was just happy I got some decent shots of him eating, then I noticed the ninjas in the scaffolding

I guess OH&S is not so big here, although it should be noted he is actually wearing a harness, just not clipped onto anything. I saw some of these guys up close and they do wear ninja shoes with the separated toe. Also the guys I saw were wearing Hakama (kind of like culottes) which, in my mind, are a martial arts thing.
Obviously Hakama are a normal bit of clothing with centuries of use so I shouldn't be surprised to see them in a different context.

Rating: 8.5/10 (Raaaaarghhhh)

Wind not evident.

Sign Review: Happy Rabbits Verboten!

I am not sure leaving the gate open is the stereotypical reason Rabbits are happy

Rating: 9/10 (or maybe it just saying don't dress your rabbit like people)

Wind evident via Domino Effect

Today was quite windy. With the wind the chill factor was quite fierce and I started to regret leaving all my winter clothes in Poland. Ewa stole Conrads gloves and we two manly men struggled on trying not to complain much.

Activity Review: The Planning Stage

For dinner we went back to the Izaka that is always full, we got seats at the counter this time as just two of us and they aren't going to waste one of their 6 or 7 four person booths on 2 people.

This was meant to remind me of something. Normally photos work well for that but when I can't read the text it makes for a slightly less useful technique.

Sitting at the counter meant we could watch the Sushi Dude slicing and rolling and then he just reached over to put it in front of us. I noticed he was using one of the same knives I have (but left in Poland) then I got a bit obsessed with his rice rolling dexterity.

The look of disbelief could have been related to comments about the knife which might have implied some kind of similarity between Sushi Dude and Me.

In Sydney I made sushi a few times for the Ladies. Each piece took forever and was never the right size or consistency. 

Pork and Sweet sauce might have inspired me

I had a brilliant idea. If we go back often enough before Sushi season finishes he will get used to us. Then I ask him if he can open the restaurant early one day and give me a bit of training. It can be my present to Ewa! I am a Kind (and Generous) Man.

Rating: 9/10 (It Still Seems Like A Great Idea Unlike So Many Others I Have)

Oh Great. Fish Jerky. Our Apartment is 28 square metres. The stench will carry.

Polish Vodka costs the same here as it does in Poland

Alcohol and Cigarettes cost the same here as they do in Poland. However the cost of living and most other things cost about the same as Australia. I think that means that booze and fags are basically free here. This may explain some aspects of Japanese Culture.

Scotches are weird. In Poland scotch prices are roughly the same as in Australia. Here they look about half either countries price.

The Japanese economy is confusing. Still thinking it through and asking questions which at each iteration show me I still don't have a clue how it works. I might need to go to a supermarket to order my thoughts and gather on the ground data.

So close Mr Blond...

I have also been looking at license plates. Lots of them only have a couple of numbers on them. I was thinking that is weird as there are some three or four million people here.

Then I realised that just because the squiggly bits don't mean anything to me and I can't resolve the differences from more than a few feet away doesn't mean they are not there for a purpose.

Sometimes I can be rather slow on the uptake. I hope our Japanese teacher has experience with Special Students.

2015-03-24: Back To Real Training

They don't hit back, I like that!

Linguistic Skills:

In English you get a cold from going out in the cold. In Japan a cold is called the same as wind.

All sickly folk get cookies!

I think we decided that grandmothers here say you can catch a wind from going out in the wind. I like the symmetry.

Rating: 8/10 (If it is true anyway - sometimes I don't explain myself well)

I don't have armour yet but I went to training anyway as my Hakama and Keikogi (Stick waving clothes) should arrive today. Unfortunately the jacket that arrived was a kendo one so I ended up training in a T Shirt, quite the fashion statement.

Bottom right pic, I'd recognise that belly anywhere

I trained at this dojo about 4 years ago. Looking at the message board I was surprised to see that Al and I are in one of the photos for a flyer.

He is not worried about me being a threat.

Actually even the little girls are probably feeling quite safe

They aren't afraid of Conrad and he is way scarier than me

And the older members of the dojo have lots of experience with faster, younger and prettier people than me

Maybe my "I don't get hangovers" secret skill can be brought into play...

But I am probably in for a wakeup after three months of no training

I didn't get in trouble so I consider that a good training.

2015-03-23: Curry For The Sickly

The Polish Kiddies tendency to pass us diseases given the chance has taken again. Ewa had a slight cold when we left Białystok, it has taken root and made it to me as well. Normally this means she will get better while I mutate it and then I give her the new improved version back. Hooray!

When I am sick I like spicy food. We have Curry on the checklist! Hooray. Thanks Polish Kiddies!

Tourist Checklist: CoCo Ichibanya

https://www.ichibanya.co.jp/english/
The basic idea is choose:

So much Manga

A sauce (pork, beef, hashed beef)

This is not the meat on top, just the sauce. It has a few small bits of meat in it but not a huge factor. Japanese curry tends towards sweet rather than chilli. I think the sweetness works better with pork. There are also other sauces but they are not in the menu under choices and the guy doesn't speak English so I am working on a point and gesticulate vaguely principle which means go for the easy options.

Takeout Bento, Chicken, Pork Sauce with pickles

Level of Spiciness

Spice level is from Base to 10. Base is the default. Apparently they claim you have to have had a 5 before you are allowed anything higher. On my I'm an uncouth heathen principle I tried a 3 (vaguely spicy) and a 5 (hotter but still nothing like a mild green thai curry by comparison). The spice doesn't have the lasting burn of chilli but it is a little zingy. No eyelid sweat though which is my baseline for whether something is hot.

Step One

Volume of Rice 

Default option is 300g. I doubt you want more. The sauce is adjusted to match the rice volume.

Two

Toppings

So many toppings! You can mix and match like crazy. If you want crumbed pork and a cheese stuffed hamburger patty (I did) you can have that if you wave and point enough. The menu only has a small list of toppings / additional things. But anything in the pictures is fair game for adding to anything else. I assume that is the case anyway, maybe he just wanted the crazy guy out of there as fast as possible.

Three and pour

You can add the toppings to the salads as well.

The guy taking my order finished up by saying Bento a few times. I was confused by this but don't know enough Japanese to disagree so I just said Hai a few times, threw in a bow to be safe and sat down in the library to wait.

This is too much food for us

We got takeout as delivery would be impossible, I can't even say my address. We shall return and eat in another time. When I got home I could sort of see why it is called Bento. My mum wants some Bento boxes, I doubt these would satisfy even if I washed them good...

Rating: 2/12 (and the food is an 8/10 on cold days)

Flakes on the roll with sweet curry sauce inside

Probably because I was deluded and feverish I had earlier decided to grab a Kare-Pan (Japanese Curry Bread). Then I grabbed two of the local stuffed breads as well.

Pizza and Burger stuffed sticky rolls

The Kare Pan is nice enough and definitely was the inspiration for having proper curry for dinner. The other two were a bit on the sticky side for me. Kind of like a not very good cha siu bao. They were from a convenience store though so might be better from other places.

Cultural Observations: Tissues

Lots of people in the street hand out packages of tissues. These are apparently a popular form of street marketing. I grabbed some for our sniffles.

Apparently I would not be allowed in the club advertised though

The tissues are not super great quality but they are free. I don't think you are meant to use them in public though. There is some Japanese thing about blowing your nose being really gross.

Rating: 7/10 (Free tissues, sexy pictures, what's not to like?)