We were going to leave last night and go back to Krakow. After dinner (and cake). We did not.
I did make my most complex statement in Polish last night: "We are not going to Aga's brothers house because he is sick." I cannot write that statement but it does have my current favourite Polish word in it because "we will" sounds a lot like a rubber band being plucked. I wonder if I could get a rubber band and just use that when required for the various rubber band noises they make in their language... an idea to investigate. I could be like the Sammy Hagar of Poland!
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| I am really sure the middle two at least are still cool in Poland |
Except I cocked up the word for sick and instead said because he has Cholera. Which I think everyone would agree still got the message across. Plus he apparently has 5 children and got an award from the council for having so many children.
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| Polish candy is named after the characteristics of their men. |
Oh and Cholera is actually a swear word in Polish. They really don't like water borne diseases here at all. Probably explains the vodka.
The award doesn't actually do anything except, I guess, say "well you must have had sex a fair few times, nice work".
I do not claim that the fear of cholera was the reason we stayed in the small, safe village.
I did add at the end of my complex Polish statement ask "would you like vodka". The answer was yes. I like this small safe village.
We did culture today. On the way to culture we went through the local village. Apparently the local village council has no idea what to do with all the money coming in from the EU and so they come up with schemes. The (tiny) village square has been illuminated with lights. Lots of lights.
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| Bitch from Narnia wouldn't know which lamppost to grab. |
On the way to culture we followed the traditional standard of "culture is over there" signs. Some people may remember I made fun of a toy museum in the Blue Mountains using the brown sign as a bit of a foil on which to place poo jokes. They use brown signs for culture here too. Maybe everyone thinks, deep down, tourists are shit.
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| A Simple Truth |
Tourist Checklist: Museums, Museum Kultury Ludowej
http://www.muzeum-wegorzewo.pl/
It is a museum of houses, they are old. Not old by Polish standards but as an antipodean (I still don't know if I am kiwi or aussie and suspect both countries have valid reasons to exclude me) anything older than say 100 years counts as old.
Aga says her grandparents lived in houses like these
so I guess by anyone's standards the houses are not that old (unless
her grandparents got useless certificates saying "holy crap you're still
alive, I already sent you one of these" from the Polish version of the
Queen). Also of course her grandparents must have been way the hell
tougher than me. I got a bit of sniffles just looking at the houses.
I took lots of pictures, the rest of this review is pictorial.
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| Pictorial. Cultural |
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| Water Mill! Engineering! |
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| Frozen Lake, shortcut. Princess forbids. |
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| saving potatoes and hiding from Russians and the bad germans (all russians are bad) |
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| Sportscar for the prom! Open top! So cool! |
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| Poland so, yeah, Church. |
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| I do occasionally wonder what the Japanese on my boots is actually saying. Can't be more offensive than me I guess. |
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| Was Pub. Was Closed. Country -> Hell in a Handbasket. |
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| And Aga said her grandparents had one of these for water or animal feed or some such. pffft Vodka Reservoir. Built after the great Vodka shortage of 1138 which directly resulted in the Cowardly Swedes coming to visit. I don't know what they teach the youth these days! |
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| There are a few of these, crosses with Jesus and flowers, Mary and prophylactics, Joseph and some legal document regarding paternal maintenance. You know, normal stuff. |
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| But this is real. Jesus is sick of all your crap and just wants 5 minutes of peace and quiet please. |
Rating:6/10 (do not do this on a cold day, i.e. less than 10 below zero but in summer you have to pay, arguably do not do this with religious people that can't take a joke when you see the pooping jesus)
On the way home we stopped at the village supermarket.
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| Ziemnak would be a single potato. It would be huge. But cheap. |
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| I made Ewa hold it covering the "IE" with her thumb. I ate it anyway. Coconut and wafer. |
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| Dinner for culture warriors |
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| Bowl of soup, croutons, all that cake, sorted. |
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| Ahhh the main course has arrived (the other bowls of mashed potatoes, rice, more chicken and mushroom etc out of frame). Chicken was pretty damn good though. I think they use porcinis but call them something else. |
Sign Review: School Zone, Village somewhere near Krakow.
They don't have speed reduction or anything, they just have a sign indicating that kiddies like lollipops more than looking for cars.
Makes sense to me.
Rating: 9/10 (and I don't even drive)
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